Life of Brian: QAF Recap 507 06-26-05 Page 11

A Lesson In Standards
by StickyKeys Queer As Folk Episode 507 Aired 06-26-05


Sloppy Seconds Are Just Firsts That Were Humble!
Ted and Emmett are at Woody’s drinking as Brian comes up and orders another beer. Emmett adds a Cosmo and a Diet Pepsi to the order all on him. When Brian asks what the occasion is, Emmett informs him that they’re celebrating, “Teddy finally put that prick Troy in his proper place.” Ted is trying to look proud, but failing miserably. Brian asks if Troy’s proper place is up a tight butt hole, but Em says it’s out on his ass. Brian raises his beer and says, “Congrats Theodore, it’s a rare man who’d rather get even then get laid.” They clink bottles and Brian walks off.

Emmett cracks me up because he knows he kind of messed up so he’s trying to make light of the situation, “Just out of curiosity, how great was he?” Ted says Troy was beyond great, “Amazing, the best.” Does Ted remember that he and Emmett have dated and had sex, does Emmett? Does anyone remember that?

Nina: I don’t remember that. (Nina’s a sporadic watcher).

Jerrod: I prefer not to remember.

Emmett kind of raises his eyebrows and says, “You wouldn’t happen to still have his phone number?” He doesn’t really finish his sentence, just kind of slinks off. It’s completely cute and completely Emmett so of course he is forgiven for any wrong doing. Even Ted shakes his head and smiles.


Those Chickens is Ash and I’m Lotion
Brian is playing pool and about to hit a ball until someone grabs his pool cue. It ends up being Brandon and I see I was completely wrong about Brand’s jacket, it is totally wicked awesome!

Nina: Wicked awesome?

SK: That’s the only way to describe it.

Jerrod: Indeed.

Nina: Wicked A!

The front is black and it does have the red and white line, but the shoulders are blue and there are red accents on the shoulders, and sides.
“What the fuck is your problem?” Brandon asks, “Your hand’s on my stick.” Heh, oh QAF writers of double entendre excellence, you never fail to amuse me. Brandon wants to know why Brian barred him from his club and Brian correctly ascertains that he did it, “Because I can.” Alrighty then. He goes on to say that getting sucked off on the dance floor is a very serious offense. I’m sure it’s right up there with grand theft pajama. Brandon says it’s serious, “Except when it’s you.” Brian points out that it’s one of the many benefits of membership, but Brandon has another theory, “I think you threw me out because your afraid that I’ll get the hottest guy.” Brian informs Brandon (and God I hate that name in this context) that he is the hottest guy. I’m sure Ben would beg to differ… but only slightly, I still love you BriBri! Brandon says that Brian’s reign is coming to an end,

“You mean, were.”
“Since when?”
“Since now. Even the mightiest man must one day fall. The kind is assassinated, the lion is torn to shreds.” Brian stops Brandon with a disgusted look, “Oh Lord please spare us from wearisome clichés!” Ha! That’s hilarious because as Demian at Moldy’s boards correctly pointed out, “without those clichés, this series never would have made it through its first season, much less make it through FIVE of them." Ha! It’s funny because it’s true. I think Brian knows it’s true and knows that he spews a lot of crap, but I think he’s disillusioned in that he thinks in someway he’s clowning the system by using it against himself. Really he’s just being a pompous jerk, but he doesn’t have to know that just yet, then we’d stop getting awesomely bad scenes like this!

“Listen. Twerp (HAHA!), you think you get to be the best by just showing up and announcing you are? You have to prove it first.” Brandon thought he already had which leaves Brian questioning, “by picking off a couple of twinks before I got to them? You’re going to have to do better than that.” Brandon devises his own test, “Then how about we pick, say the 10 hottest guys we can find,” Brian finishes for him, “and the one who fucks them all first wins?” I thought he was a little disgusted by the whole thing until Brandon continues, “you know the game.” Brian does indeed, “I also know the outcome.” Brandon smiles a little and says, “I admire your confidence, but they say every star burns it’s brightest (Brian leans in like, huh?) just before it burns out.”
“Oooohhhhh!” Heh, I’m loving Brian in this scene. I must admit that I thought they would try to punk Brian with this Brandon crap, but so far so good. If Brandon wins he gets to go to the club. Yeah, so he sleeps with 10 men so he can dance.

Nina: What? That’s some bullshit, can I at least get a free drink?

Jerrod: Don’t forget you would also get pride.

Nina: Fuck pride, I want some Cris!

If Brian wins he gets into Brandon. He says it in this great DUH! way that cracks me up. I’m telling you Brian, the cleaning bill of all the grease out of your sheets is so not worth it.

The funniest thing about this is that it’s so much like Hercules and I wonder if that’s intentional? Brian is Zeus and Brandon is Hercules trying to be a god so he does all of these trials so he can become a deity. It’s an interesting parallel, but only if it’s the Disney version and includes dancing and singing.


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